Sex Ed and Sex Pressure
Sex Ed is basically non-existent here in China (and some parts of the U.S.!), so Peace Corps has a program for teaching basic sexual health/HIV&AIDS prevention etc. Several volunteers in my area have given this lecture and I'm going to ask to do it at my school next year. It's gender specific and culturally appropriate for this area. In addition to the health issues, we can talk about dating and social issues that aren't usually discussed here.
During the past year, I've talked with several women about sexual pressure. It's disheartening to realize how many women have felt pressured sexually to do things they're not comfortable with, and that it is often seen as something that "happens to everyone." So here are some things I'd want my students (and all people!) to know:
1. It's okay to tell their partner if something makes them feel uncomfortable.
2. It's okay to expect their partner to listen to them and not pressure them.
3. If their partner doesn't listen, they might feel embarrassed or afraid to leave, but they can leave if the pressure doesn't stop. Giving in isn't the only option.
4. It's okay to have boundaries. And it's okay to adjust them as you feel comfortable, not necessarily when society or your partner says you should. We are not machines.
5. Someone who pressures you might also blow you off, dump you, or change how they treat you. It's okay to let them go.You can find someone who won't pressure you and will listen to your comfort level.
I wish men and women who use pressure understood what effect it can have on the self-esteem and confidence of their partner, especially if their partner is not very experienced in these things. It's basically saying, "What you're comfortable with is not good enough for me. And what I want is more important than your feelings or who you are as a person."
I really hope my school lets me do this lecture. I want my students to be healthy and happy. I want them to have confidence in themselves. I want them to know what too many people learn the hard, and sad, way.
(p.s., I am leaving tomorrow for a few weeks away on one of my summer expeditions. Take care all!)
During the past year, I've talked with several women about sexual pressure. It's disheartening to realize how many women have felt pressured sexually to do things they're not comfortable with, and that it is often seen as something that "happens to everyone." So here are some things I'd want my students (and all people!) to know:
1. It's okay to tell their partner if something makes them feel uncomfortable.
2. It's okay to expect their partner to listen to them and not pressure them.
3. If their partner doesn't listen, they might feel embarrassed or afraid to leave, but they can leave if the pressure doesn't stop. Giving in isn't the only option.
4. It's okay to have boundaries. And it's okay to adjust them as you feel comfortable, not necessarily when society or your partner says you should. We are not machines.
5. Someone who pressures you might also blow you off, dump you, or change how they treat you. It's okay to let them go.You can find someone who won't pressure you and will listen to your comfort level.
I wish men and women who use pressure understood what effect it can have on the self-esteem and confidence of their partner, especially if their partner is not very experienced in these things. It's basically saying, "What you're comfortable with is not good enough for me. And what I want is more important than your feelings or who you are as a person."
I really hope my school lets me do this lecture. I want my students to be healthy and happy. I want them to have confidence in themselves. I want them to know what too many people learn the hard, and sad, way.
(p.s., I am leaving tomorrow for a few weeks away on one of my summer expeditions. Take care all!)
Comments
Have fun traveling! Can't wait to hear all about it.
Rock on, chick!
Have fun on your expedition. Hope you'll still be updating every now and then. And take pics.
Hope you have fun on your trip! Be Safe.
Have fun..we will miss you!
Have fun! Enjoy your travels, Chica!! :)
Have fun on your trip. Can't wait to hear about it.