Rebecca A. Foster

Because I must have this dress, I'm going to look incredible while I put together this year's puzzle and have a Netflix marathon. Wooo! I'll post pics.  Or maybe I'll actually take the dress' advice and go out this year!

First: New York: A Documentary Film , by Ric Burns (brother of Ken Burns), an interesting, engaging and entertaining 8-part documentary series on the history of the city of New York. Originally aired on PBS but I'm watching it on Amazon Prime on my iPad. It's long, over 14 hours, but I've learned a lot, and learned a lot more respect for, how NYC became what it is and why it is so wonderful. The documentary How the Universe Works from Discovery Channel: awesome. Makes me feel like life is a miracle and a blessing and I'm lucky to be a part of the human race. And then I go jeans shopping and I get all bummed out because of the size of jeans that fit me really well and look good. Really, Rebecca? This is what you feel bad about? Get a grip. But...gosh, don't we want to feel attractive? And I flashback to this time I was with this guy and I had made the effort to look attractive and he said, "You look really comfortable" and part of me thinks, ...

If I could install a magic mirror in my house? This is what I would see in that mirror. Her beauty and fashion style in this picture is my idea of perfection: I know it's really important to love and accept yourself, everyone is beautiful in their own way, blah blah blah, but I would so totally buy that mirror.

My Holy Grail of bras: no lining, no padding, and cute. Beige bra with embroidered flowers: Felina . Black lace bra: Victoria's Secret. Both have matching panties available. (I bought my Felina at Macy's.)  

I'm taking advantage of the MacBook Pro I use for work and putting together some movies of my pictures and videos from China. Between that and the book, it's one reason I haven't been around here much. I keep finding treasures in the crevices of my picture files, like this picture of a 'ma la' skirt. In Mandarin, 'ma' 麻 means 'numbing' and 'la' 辣 means 'spicy', and 'ma la' is a phrase commonly used as slang to describe Chongqing girls; the weather and the food are numbingly hot and spicy, and so therefore are the women. This is an adult woman's skirt. As you can see, it's about half my size. I can't imagine getting even my butt in this thing, let alone my legs. Chongqing style is very ma la: short, tiny, tight, bright, covered in sequins and embellishments. Chongqing is sort of the Rio of China, I guess. I had a girl once tell me, while dressed in tiny panty shorts and a see-through shirt: "I am a tradit...

It is said that of all our senses, our sense of smell is most closely connected to our emotional center. A man's shirt  is an excellent conduit for the essence of the person who wore it: not only the smell, but the shape, the worn and faded spots, the memories I have of seeing them in it. For these reasons, I love it when men give me their shirts. As I regularly recycle my wardrobe in the spring and fall, these shirts have a permanent spot in my bottom dresser drawer. I'd never consider getting rid of them. My favorite shirts were given to me straight off the wearer's back, still warm and musky. I deliberately leave them unwashed for as long as possible. Not a single of these shirts fits me properly, so I wear them to bed or the gym or while lounging about in my apartment. I don't know that any shirt I've received was significant to the wearer before they gifted it to me, but I can't wear them without feeling the happy memories I have associated with the gifte...

Chinese students almost uniformly make the mistake of pluralizing 'clothes' into 'clothes-es' and we are the kind of teachers that mimicked our students most common mistakes when talking to each other, so now I say 'clothes-es' all the time in my head. Other things we said: Deeleeciours (delicious) Advices I wish you happy every day! I miss speaking Chinglish on a daily basis. Luckily I still talk to folks in China so when they say things like this, I write them down. You think you won't forget, but you do! Did you know in Chinese culture it is normal to wear the same clothes for several days in a row? (Not underwear, that I know of!) You wear them until they are dirty, then change into new clothes and wash the ones you've been wearing. It was really hard to get used to at first, but then I loved it. It's much easier than having to choose new outfits every day. My students thought it was really strange Americans change our clothes every day. ...

Today was a hard day. I had to go to a funeral for a relative at the same cemetery where my dad is buried, a place I have steadfastly avoided the last four years. My step-sister said to me, "Is it hard for you to be here too? Or is it just me?" I felt so much better knowing I wasn't alone in feeling bad/anxiety today. We agreed we might be big babies, but at least we weren't alone. So, I need to take my mind off of things. 1. I went to Eddie Bauer later to buy a cream colored soft shirt, because they are the only ones I know who make great cream-colored (not white) layering shirts. While I was there, I saw this Downlight hoodie pullover , in coffee, my size, on sale. I am now the proud owner of a really warm, sporty jacket. I figure if I'm going to live here now, I should build up a winter wardrobe. I love this new jacket. 2. A friend this week said he thought Marion Cotillard is my doppelganger. I would never make that connection, but it's a really n...

I bought a new bra recently and didn't notice until I got home that it had built-in nipple flowers; like these, but already embedded: Nipples are so racy. Why? I mean, I've seen the effect they can have on men, but I don't get it. Mens' and womens' breasts are different, but their nipples are a lot the same. Men's nipples are no big deal, so why are women's? I mean, sure, if the breast is naked, it's a little racy. But nipples through clothing? You know they're there, right? We're not human Barbie dolls. Why is it so shocking to see nipples through clothing? I also saw this blog post a few days ago; looks like I am not alone in my nipple pondering. My favorite bras are sheer lace, because to me they are the most comfortable. But have you been to a bra section lately? It's like now lace bras are the realm of Fredericks of Hollywood, because it's just row after row of thick fabric, padded bras. I don't remember when this happe...

I can only think of two times in my life when I was clearly a vixen, and I have to admit, both times were really fun! I should do it more often, I'm just lazy or something. In San Antonio, for a time I was casually seeing J., who played in a band and had the best house ever. After it was clear we had the chemistry of friendship, not romance, we still hung out and I would have totally moved into his house, because J. was so cool and had a house tricked out like a 60's Rat Pack bar. This is a picture of me on his bed: Yes, he had mirrors on the ceiling. But this story is before that time. I went to see J.'s band play and as sometimes happens when you see a band play, I wore slightly more vixen-ish clothing than I did in my everyday life, namely black leather pants and a sassy shirt. (Sassy = cleavage.) After he played and came down to me in the audience, he ran into a girl that turned out to be the sister of a girl he had recently been seriously involved with, and who...

My brother got me this mug for Christmas and I think I actually squealed with delight. I've written before about my love for the show Community , my favorite show on tv right now. I'm obliged to sing the "Troy and Abed In The Morning" song whenever I talk about this mug. My favorite thing about it is that the picture is the same on both sides, which means holding it in my left hand I can still see the picture, unlike my panda mug, which makes me stare at panda butt. Yay for double sided mugs! And Troy and Abed! ____ My Chilean mom gave us tea growing up as medicine, so I was quite prepared for this aspect of Chinese culture. I was not prepared for the tea itself, though. When the swine flu was going around, my school boss gave me a bag of bark and twigs and told me to make tea out of it to protect myself. With all due respect, no way was I doing that. I could smell the tea through the sealed bag, not a good sign. G. had a bad cold and tells the story of going to...

I got this t-shirt at Target several years ago. Yes, I do love nerds. Nerds know cool things! And can do cool stuff!  Now, saying you like nerds is not the same as saying you like socially awkward types, although there might be some overlap*. To me, nerds are people who care a lot about something and invest themselves in it deeply and don't care if it's cool or not; they do something because they love it, not because they care what anyone else thinks about it. And if it's not mainstream? All the cooler. Nerds unite! *I'm okay with socially awkward. It can be cute. _____ I hate wearing clothes. I'd go topless all the time if I could. My mom used to always say she hated wearing clothes and I was so scandalized by this! Moms should be dressed at all times! But now I totally get it. I have a bit of a reputation of liking to wear as little as possible, whenever possible. (I was gchatting with someone and they connected by video; me: "Um, I'm not dressed....

I have many declarations. My long-term favorite is "He/She/It is dead to me." I can hold a grudge like a hiker holding onto a ledge. It's a real talent. But last night R. and I were gchat video chatting (I love R.; she is, quite simply, awesome) and she said, "You know what sucks about being home? I can no longer excuse things by saying, 'Ain't no shame in China.'" She's right. "Ain't no shame in China" is a declaration I made about a year in, when I stopped being polite and started being real. (Ha! Old-school, in the house!) It became our rallying cry: Get hooked on Gossip Girl and actually discuss it with friends? Ain't no shame in China. Drink 120 proof Chinese liquor too quickly and puke all over your hotel room like a college kid? Ain't no shame in China. Kiss a guy in a bar (twice! In two different bars!) you'd never have kissed in America? Ain't no shame in China. Wear mismatched clothing and lots of c...

Back in San Antonio, my friend Stacey had asked me to pick her up from the airport. It was full summer, and for those of you who haven't been in San Antonio in the summertime, you know that expression 'hot as an oven'? Well, I like to say San Antonio summers are 'hot as downwind from an exhaust pipe.' (Which means when you actually are downwind from an exhaust pipe, things get really unpleasant.) It's quite common for there to be a temperature difference of 35-40 degrees between indoor and outdoor air during a San Antonio summer. True story: I had a small heater at my work desk and turned it on in the summer, not winter, because the air conditioning was on so high in our building I froze to death at my desk. So anyway, I go straight from the gym to the airport to pick up Stacey. It's 10 pm but still around 100 degrees outside. Inside, it's a balmy 60 or so. Gotta give those tourists a false sense of comfort! I'm pacing a bit in the baggage area wa...

You guys, let me be honest for a minute: the past month has been tough. I gave up my apartment in San Antonio to go to China, and just before leaving I moved all my stuff to my mom’s. So that’s where I am while I job search, at my mom’s. This is not a bad thing at all; I’m closer to my brother and sister and extended family, and my mom is easy to live with. BUT, it’s certainly not where I want or expected to be. I’ve had to change my attitude the past week or so; I’m choosing to be grateful for gifts and opportunities I have in my life right now, rather than focus on what (I think) I lack. One of the great things is that my mom lives in a colder climate than San Antonio, so I get to indulge my love of socks. I LOVE socks—cute and versatile and less expensive than buying shoes and purses. In San Antonio I hardly ever got to wear socks because it’s just too warm most of the year; I had an extensive collection of chanclas , but hardly any socks. In Chongqing, I wore tall socks a...

I saw this picture on the internet and laughed out loud, because over the past year or so in Chongqing the trend has become for girls to wear control top pantyhose under their teeny-tiny shorts, so that the line of the control top shows below the line of the shorts. To them, this is very sexy and provocative. To us, it was a fashion faux pas! But if the picture is any indication, maybe it'll catch on here too? I've mentioned this before, but having bare legs is a little bit of a taboo in the city where I lived-- you can wear shorts and skirts with a 1/2 inch inseam, no problem, just don't have bare legs. And always wear high heels. In Chongqing, women literally wear high heeled shoes even when climbing mountains. It never stopped amazing me. It was always interesting to me the cultural differences in what is provocative in China vs. America. Probably the biggest other difference I noticed was cleavage: sexy and shown off in America, not so much in my city. My student...

Caution: this is kind of a girly post. For those who don't know me personally, I am half Chilean, half American. I inherited my mom's darker Chilean coloring and my dad's American features. I'm a mutt! And all my life people (salespersons, friends, etc.) have been telling me my coloring is Winter, because I have dark hair and dark eyes. Winters have pink undertones in their skin and look great in lots of white, black, navy blue, cherry reds, purples, etc... And gray. I LOVE gray. My mom would always tell me I looked like I was constantly dressing for a funeral because I wore so much black, gray, and white. But I noticed in lots of pictures, I looked kinda terrible. I thought I just really didn't take good pictures. So one day I'm in China innocently looking something up on the internet and I read that many Latina and Asian women are not Winter, they are Autumn: dark hair and eyes but with gold undertones to their skin, not pink, and that a quick way to check...

I decided to have a traditional, formal qipao made for me before I left China. It's black with gold dragons, and ankle length. I picked out the fabric and the style and a local tailor made it: And here it is from behind. See what I told you about my butt?? Oh well, I'll soon be leaving you behind, Chinese stairs: The teacher at my school assigned to help me the last two years also became my friend. His father and grandfather survived the Cultural Revolution and have a collection of Chairman Mao pins from that era. It was important to show your allegiance to Chairman Mao, and one way to do that was to wear these pins. He gave me a pin from his family's collection as a going away gift; I was incredibly humbled by his generosity at giving me part of his family's history. I will treasure it always. I went to a Unesco World Heritage Buddhist mountain site near my city. It was a very Chinese adventure! It took me 3 buses to get to the mountain top, and I was 'ado...

A few random pictures I took last week: Seaweed Pringles: Eating 4th of July 'American Potato Salad with Chinese Characteristics' with chopsticks: The NBA is super popular here; this is a kid's team practicing on my campus, outfitted in Lakers jerseys. Licensed by the Lakers? I have no idea...but I'm guessing no: Guy sitting across from me on the subway; his t-shirt says "Cnly Cod Can Judge Me":

So, true story: when I was around 7-8 years old I thought stripping was the best thing ever. I wanted to be a stripper when I grew up, and I used to put on my dad's soundtrack to The Sting , crank up Hooker's Hooker , put on all the clean clothes from the laundry room and play stripper for hours in the living room. (I always stopped at my own clothes! I only took off the extra laundry!) My parents, being the laid-back parents they are, didn't freak out or chasten me for playing stripper. In fact, I don't remember them ever saying anything to me about it, ever. And one day, I just stopped thinking I wanted to be a stripper. Please note that at age 8, I had only a marginal idea of what strippers actually did; I thought it was just wearing pretty clothes and dancing, two things I still think are pretty awesome. As an adult, I asked my dad why he never told me to stop playing stripper or to stop saying that when I grew up, I wanted to be a stripper. And my dad told me, ...