Rebecca A. Foster

First: New York: A Documentary Film , by Ric Burns (brother of Ken Burns), an interesting, engaging and entertaining 8-part documentary series on the history of the city of New York. Originally aired on PBS but I'm watching it on Amazon Prime on my iPad. It's long, over 14 hours, but I've learned a lot, and learned a lot more respect for, how NYC became what it is and why it is so wonderful. The documentary How the Universe Works from Discovery Channel: awesome. Makes me feel like life is a miracle and a blessing and I'm lucky to be a part of the human race. And then I go jeans shopping and I get all bummed out because of the size of jeans that fit me really well and look good. Really, Rebecca? This is what you feel bad about? Get a grip. But...gosh, don't we want to feel attractive? And I flashback to this time I was with this guy and I had made the effort to look attractive and he said, "You look really comfortable" and part of me thinks, ...

Spanish culture places a high value on fun, which is why I believe boring is worse than bad. So when a man is repeatedly selfish/kinda jerky, I should immediately walk away, right? But if he's fun, I don't always right away. I'm not proud of this. Just keepin' it real, son. I showed the Nike ' Write the Future ' commercial in my employee training class this week and when Ronaldo came on screen, the guys immediately started with the "He's a douchebag" Ronaldo screed. I counterargued, "But he's so hot!" Which is true. You see, it's not that Ronaldo is NOT a jerk/douchebag, it's that I don't care. Don't need to. To a varying degree, this is also true of men I know: if I don't want to date them, it doesn't matter too much how selfish they are, or how often they contact or want to see me, as long as I have fun when they do. (Many guys I like I don't want to date seriously, for various reasons. And that goes bo...

(Note: oh gosh! This post is why I should only post in the daytime. I'm not a night person, I say silly things after 10:00 PM, even on this blog. But I'm leaving it up. The real me, or something.) Sometimes a guy whose opinion matters to you thinks you're desirable and it's awesome! Evolution in action. Sometimes they stop (or stop showing it) and you might think, "What did I do to stop being desirable?"  But someone else's actions (or lack of them) shouldn't change the inherent desirability you believe about yourself*. Of course, if he stops showing or saying it, move on and find someone who does . It's nice to believe you're desirable. It's nice to not have to rely solely on that, either. 1. As I like to say, "I have enough male friends now. If you don't want to put your tongue in my mouth, you're useless to me." 2. I have also said, to a guy I liked but who would come over at night and just talk talk talk, ...

Read this article today about a new line of candles geared toward men, with smells like 'Lawnmower' and '2x4.' What they really need to make are a line of candles that smell like men's accoutrement, such as 'Men's Locker Room When All The Soap And Cologne Mingle Together And They Are Only Wearing Little White Towels.' A guy in a little white towel should be on the label. I would buy the sh*t out of that candle. Other ideas: Men's Neck Smell Blue Eyes and a Cute Smile Green Eyes and Dimples Playing With Your Hair Nice Hands Holding Hands Walking Down A Busy City Street Then Stopping For Street Food Yum Cuddling On A Bench Waiting For The Subway To Start Running After A Night Out Sweating After Doing A Hard Task Men's Soft Hair  Fire (Oh wait I think they have this one already.) This is just off the top of my head. I could go on. 

This morning, in my bleary-eyed state, I succeeded, without trying, in putting my bra on inside -out. When I realized my mistake, I couldn't get it off, because it's really hard to hook and unhook an inside-out bra? I have no idea how I managed this without even trying? This is what I get for putting on a bra before noon on Saturday. Either that, or I really missed my calling.

You know those dainty little thrower-uppers, who just sort of tilt their head down, put their hand to their mouth and spit up? It's like they had throw-up classes at finishing school, or were the most well-behaved babies ever and never grew out of it. Yeah, that is so not me . I am a throw-up drama queen, all moans and groans and heavy breathing. It's like the end of the world, or my liver, when I puke. I was reminded of that this week when I woke up Thursday morning at 4:30 AM and rushed to the bathroom before emptying my stomach several times over, to be repeated with water, Sprite and dry heaves for the next few days. Stomach flu is the worst! But, as always, it reminded me of something funny. (I consider my ability to find the humor and funny aspects of life to be one of my more humane qualities. You're welcome, humanity.) Picture it: China, spring time, T.'s apartment, 1 AM. I'm slowly turning green and it's apparent I'm going to start tossing my cook...

All of the Anthony Weiner press coverage makes me feel somewhat validated for having done this . I stand by it. I don't as a general rule comment on current event news stories here, because I can't imagine anyone gives a rat's ass what I think about the news. However, the subsequent debate about whether or not sexting is cheating reminded me of the short, personal checklist I've amassed of potential red flags that the guy asking you out/hitting on you isn't as uninvolved as he claims to be*: 1. Only wants to see you during non-prime time hours, i.e. lunch but never dinner. 2. Gives you an email address and/or phone number just for you (you usually find this out when he calls/emails you from the other by accident). 3. Only wants to talk to you from work. 4. He has a cat and lives alone (so he says). (I have a bias that young, single men who want a four-legged pet get dogs, not cats. Also he turned out to be married so I was right.) 5. Only wants to see you f...

While in China, I put this mix list together for a friend. I have vague memories of dancing to it one night at his apartment; I have even vaguer memories of dancing to all of these songs back in the day. The 90's were fun. (I've included hyperlinks to every song on YouTube.) 1. Wild Thing - Tone Loc 2. I Wish - Skee Lo 3. Return of the Mack - Mark Morrison 4. Dazzey Duks - 69 Boyz 5. Ain't Too Proud To Beg - TLC 6. Get It On Tonite - Montell Jordan 7. 1,2,3,4 - Coolio 8. Doin' It - LL Cool J 9. You're Making Me High - Toni Braxton 10. The Humpty Dance - Digital Underground 11. Hypnotize - Notorious B.I.G. 12. Rumpshaker - Wreckx N Effect 13. Sweat - Inner Circle 14. Wiggle It - 2 In A Room 15. Move This - Technotronic 16. Temptations - 2Pac 17. Do Me! - Bel Biv Devoe 18. O.P.P - Naughty by Nature 19. Pony - Genuwine 20. Baby Got Back - Sir Mix-A-Lot 21. Tootsee Roll - 69 Boyz 22. Ditty - Paperboy 23. Whoot! There It Is ...

When I was in China, I was asked to write an article for the Peace Corps China wiki about what it's like being a female volunteer in China. I guess I seemed well-adjusted? Ha, little did they know the hardships I still dealt with on a daily basis. It does get easier over time, but the challenges never fully go away. I forgot about it, but the other day I searched for it and there it is! My name isn't attached, but if you want to read what I had to say about being a female Peace Corps volunteer in China, you can read it here . It was interesting to me to read it again, after being home for these months. Gosh, it wasn't easy to live there. ___________________ My grandpa has pancreatic and liver cancer; cancer sucks. I was in denial for a while about this. I think after everything I went through with my dad, I couldn't go through this again. I think I'm still in denial about it. Dealing with cancer never gets easier. He's not doing treatment, but being treated f...

I like to use the word 'lick' to convey my attraction/desire for someone. Mulder: after all these years, still very lickable.   This picture also reminds me: beard burn? Always worth it. (It also reminds of the pictures I never shared from last Halloween because I had beard rash in places other than my face.)  And this might be the military brat it me, but men with badges are hot. Even when they're not hot, they're still hot.  If Don Draper had a badge, I'd probably kitten-lick him to death. I mean, come on . 

I had a refreshing talk with my friend E. over the weekend. And let me digress and say, My stories from China often involve the guys because I saw them frequently and they were always up for shenanigans. But the guys will fade away from my life, it's inevitable. The girl friends I made there were fewer in number and I didnt see them as often, but they are rocks in my river of life. They are smart, beautiful, funny, kind and giving. The boys are fun to kiss! And hang out with! And make me laugh hard! But the girls-- R., N., E., C., and J: they are the people I want to become. ANYWAY, E. and I were talking about taking the unconventional path in life; Peace Corps often attracts people who take the unconventional path, each in our own way. When you take an unconventional path, you have to make your own markers of success, contentment, happiness, etc. How do you do this? Where do the markers come from? It can be stressful at times, having to choose and gauge and live by your own mark...

I bought a new bra recently and didn't notice until I got home that it had built-in nipple flowers; like these, but already embedded: Nipples are so racy. Why? I mean, I've seen the effect they can have on men, but I don't get it. Mens' and womens' breasts are different, but their nipples are a lot the same. Men's nipples are no big deal, so why are women's? I mean, sure, if the breast is naked, it's a little racy. But nipples through clothing? You know they're there, right? We're not human Barbie dolls. Why is it so shocking to see nipples through clothing? I also saw this blog post a few days ago; looks like I am not alone in my nipple pondering. My favorite bras are sheer lace, because to me they are the most comfortable. But have you been to a bra section lately? It's like now lace bras are the realm of Fredericks of Hollywood, because it's just row after row of thick fabric, padded bras. I don't remember when this happe...

...which are the children of an idle brain. (From Romeo and Juliet ) You know what's weird?  When you dream things you've never done in your waking life, and you like it. I dreamt I was smoking. I don't smoke, never have, but in my dream I was enjoying it oh-so-much.  But how do I know what it feels like to smoke??  How does my brain invent this dream about something I have never done?! I don't get this, and it happens with more than just smoking.  Anyway, I was puffing away, chain smoking, and enjoying it immensely. *shrug* I also have dreams I'm kissing people I've never kissed in real life. I always enjoy it. I want to tell them, "Obviously I think you'd be great to kiss" because that's a compliment, right? But then you have to admit you dream-kissed them. Awkward. Dreams are full of crazy sauce. Do you have dreams of things you've never done? Do you enjoy it?

Note: I moved into a new apartment this weekend, I'm way behind in my correspondence. I love my new apartment though; the walk-in closet is bigger than the kitchen, and includes a lighted vanity mirror and sink area for getting ready in the closet . Perfect apartment for me. ______ Story #2: This guy, I knew him before I went to China. I thought he was charming, funny, smart, interesting, handsome, and I put him on a bit of a pedestal. We were not equals when it came to life experience. I liked that about him! At that time, I was grieving for my dad and not feeling very strong. It felt good to have someone who was more knowledgeable and strong to look up to. I spent my final weekend with him before I went to China. Peace Corps discourages you from having friends or family join you for that final weekend before you depart, but I thought it would be okay because he was so great. But that weekend was much more stressful than I thought it would be; I was moving to completely un...

(If you are related to me, maybe you don't want to read this.) I think some people come from kissy families, some do not. I come from a kissy family; I'm sure this was largely due to my mom's Chilean-ness. (Some of my clearest memories of visiting Chile are of being kissed by every old woman I saw.) I love that in Chilean culture, you kiss strangers upon being introduced. So friendly! (Maybe also other Spanish cultures, not sure.) In San Antonio, it is quite common for friends to greet each other with a kiss. I got used to this. In China, I had kissing friends and non-kissing friends. When the kissing friends met up in public, I wonder if we shocked the Chinese around us, who don't hug or touch upon greeting, let alone kiss. I noticed my kissing friends in China were mostly Italian or of Italian heritage, or from the East Coast. Are you a kisser? My non-kissing friends are REALLY non-kissing. Funny how that happens. When I was younger, I thought kissing was either...

I just like knowing I live in a world where Henry Cavill exists: I absolutely do not think he would ask me out.  Turns out I have very little to say about H's! A few quick hits:  1. High-heeled camel boots: (I take it back. Henry Cavill might be blinded by the beauty of those boots and make it happen.)  2. Hugs and holding hands 3. Hot baths The H's are kind of old-school and simple, but the classics never stop being wonderful, I suppose.  _________ In other news, our girls' weekend in Jackson Hole, WY was COLD but hilarious and I came away with a new nickname, Bunny. But I'll tell that story in another post. 

I have many declarations. My long-term favorite is "He/She/It is dead to me." I can hold a grudge like a hiker holding onto a ledge. It's a real talent. But last night R. and I were gchat video chatting (I love R.; she is, quite simply, awesome) and she said, "You know what sucks about being home? I can no longer excuse things by saying, 'Ain't no shame in China.'" She's right. "Ain't no shame in China" is a declaration I made about a year in, when I stopped being polite and started being real. (Ha! Old-school, in the house!) It became our rallying cry: Get hooked on Gossip Girl and actually discuss it with friends? Ain't no shame in China. Drink 120 proof Chinese liquor too quickly and puke all over your hotel room like a college kid? Ain't no shame in China. Kiss a guy in a bar (twice! In two different bars!) you'd never have kissed in America? Ain't no shame in China. Wear mismatched clothing and lots of c...

Today is my first day at my new job. This is a really good thing for me, I'm very happy about it. Something I treasure in my friendships: good conversation. Most of my friends, the thing I remember most about them are the conversations we have. They make me laugh, think, ponder, consider, and enjoy life. In China, I learned to appreciate good conversation because I could get around and do my daily duties, but I couldn't have in-depth conversations in Chinese; I really looked forward to and enjoyed the times I spent with other English speakers, just talking. One of my favorite nights in China was the night my girlfriends C. and E. and I hung out in a cozy Chinese bar, all soft couches and cushions and low light, talking about all the issues we face as women in China, in the world, in our own lives. I felt so supported and inspired by these ladies. R. and J. and I have had countless great talks on similar topics, and our experiences in education/jobs/relationships/living. The...

This is me, my Chinese host mom (I lived with a host family my first two months in China) and the 15 year-old daughter of a family friend. It was quite common for us to be introduced to family friends so the kids could practice their English. I just met her that evening, but it's tradition in China for girls to hold hands, so she held my hand. I thought it was very sweet. You'll notice I'm not holding Mama's hand (the Chinese word for mom is 'Mama' so that's what I called her), but instead linking my arm. I always felt there was a social protocol for holding hands vs. linking arms; hands meant you were more friendly, while holding arms was a sign of respect. Friends can also link arms, but I would never have held Mama's hand. I have no idea if this is actually true in Chinese culture, it's just what I picked up and felt comfortable with. This was a very hot and humid August night; looking at that photo, I can feel all over again the sweat dripping...

I am heading out of town for a bit, not sure when I'll be able to post again. Let me assure you, I will be having a great time! However, I love you all too much to not leave you with a little yum yum. I feel guilty for loving this shower scene, because maybe it is reinforcing gender stereotypes? But then again, the loosening of the tie ! The wet shirt! The fingers in the mouth! His big, strong hands! And...now I have the vapors. Gender stereotypes can suck it. I just love this scene. Have a great week/weekend y'all!