Holding Hands, Holding Arms, Hold My Drink

This is me, my Chinese host mom (I lived with a host family my first two months in China) and the 15 year-old daughter of a family friend. It was quite common for us to be introduced to family friends so the kids could practice their English. I just met her that evening, but it's tradition in China for girls to hold hands, so she held my hand. I thought it was very sweet. You'll notice I'm not holding Mama's hand (the Chinese word for mom is 'Mama' so that's what I called her), but instead linking my arm. I always felt there was a social protocol for holding hands vs. linking arms; hands meant you were more friendly, while holding arms was a sign of respect. Friends can also link arms, but I would never have held Mama's hand. I have no idea if this is actually true in Chinese culture, it's just what I picked up and felt comfortable with.

This was a very hot and humid August night; looking at that photo, I can feel all over again the sweat dripping through my clothes.

And here I am with Mama's mama, host grandma. She was darling, as you can see. The guy in the picture is another volunteer; he came the year after I did and lived with the same host family. I came back to visit and we all went out to dinner. Again with the sweating! You can see it in both of us, but grandma looks cool and collected. I don't know how she did it. I hardly ever wore makeup on days like these, it just all dripped off within an hour. So, now you know what I look like make-up free.

Just before I left China, Mama's older sister told me, "Your skin is very beautiful now." Translation: your skin has gotten much fairer. It's true that I did get much lighter. Here's a picture from soon after I arrived in China (I'm 4th from the right):

And here's one about a year and a half in:

That's what living in a factory city with no sunshine does to you, but I'm happy to report my freckles have made a comeback since I've been home. Every day I walk out into fresh air and sunshine, I stop and appreciate it. I hope I don't stop doing that.

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I was reminiscing recently with a friend from college about a guy I had a very up-and-down relationship with, in all it's Freshman year volatileness. One time, we were in line for lunch and I asked him to hold my drink, then went to work. (I'd like to think I just lost track of time, but it's possible I lost track of time AND wanted to mess with him.) Another night we were all at a party and I asked him, "Will you hold this for me?", handed him my drink, then left the party. I heard later it took awhile before he realized I wasn't coming back. But one night I came out of my apartment and there were about a 100 plastic cups on the ground filled with water and a sign that said, "Becca will you hold these for me?" We had been fighting, and that was his apology, and it was pretty damn cute. I melted. Man, I was a dork when I was 18.