Sweet Touches, Plus Why The D.C. Metro Is My Favorite Subway

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Chinese friends are very affectionate with each other. It's common for two female friends to hold hands while they walk together, or to put their arm around a friend's shoulder while they sit together. (I snapped this picture today with my camera phone when they didn't know I was looking.) And it's common for guys to put their arm around a friend's shoulder while walking, or while sitting together. The concept of personal space is very different here,  it's superclose. I've literally felt people breathing on my neck in line at the grocery store.

I haven't sat so affectionately with someone since I rode the D.C. Metro with a guy I really liked, just prior to coming to China. (I'm usually not one for Subway Snuggling, but with him, I was.) Although I always kiss hello and goodbye with one of the male volunteers here (he started it, because I am half Spanish, I think), I mostly just do the Western hug with friends. But some of my students have started using these little Chinese friendship gestures with me, and I think it's very sweet. I take it as a compliment.

Comments

Busy Bee Suz said…
I think being affectionate with friends (and more than friends) is wonderful.
My daughters always run to hug their friends...boys AND girls. But my oldest does not like Dad or I to touch her...like WE have a virus or something...or because she is 15.
Great picture!
Monday, June 01, 2009
Scarlet said…
Living in Miami, I understand the hello and goodbye kisses all too well. I even have European pals that will kiss me on both cheeks.

We don't tend to put our arms around each other, but I think it's sweet. I like the candid shot you took of the two friends. It says a lot about the Chinese culture.
Monday, June 01, 2009
myself said…
I am little Miss Personal Space, so chalk that up as another thing that would make me rather uncomfy in China (except I can't imagine anyone in China breathing down my neck as I'm quite tall).

It's cute, I like the idea, but meh....not for me!
Monday, June 01, 2009
myself said…
PS, we do the french 2 cheeked kiss thing here though, so I've gotten used to that...with great pain...
Monday, June 01, 2009
Its Just Me - Daring to Dream said…
I think thats cool. I am a very affectionate person with those I know/like - and hugs are a part of my life. However, if I am not sure about a person or I dont like you, you get the whole "I need my personal space" handshake :)
Monday, June 01, 2009
Technodoll said…
Not sure how I would cope with that... I mean with my husband it's super affectionate but other than that I don't like people touching me or being in my "personal space".

More than once I've had to ask people to please leave me some room while in waiting queue. Like, really, do you have to breathe on my neck?!

Or maybe I just smell nice :-D
Monday, June 01, 2009
yrautca said…
DC metro is my favorite as well. And Ronald Reagan airport is the best. The combo of flying into RR airport and taking the metro was pretty nice while I lived there.
Tuesday, June 02, 2009
Katie said…
I love that. I'm very much of the Western mentality; I have my bubble, into which space no one must enter.

But sometimes I think the bubble should be broken more.
Tuesday, June 02, 2009
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