Rebecca A. Foster

(If you are related to me, maybe you don't want to read this.) I think some people come from kissy families, some do not. I come from a kissy family; I'm sure this was largely due to my mom's Chilean-ness. (Some of my clearest memories of visiting Chile are of being kissed by every old woman I saw.) I love that in Chilean culture, you kiss strangers upon being introduced. So friendly! (Maybe also other Spanish cultures, not sure.) In San Antonio, it is quite common for friends to greet each other with a kiss. I got used to this. In China, I had kissing friends and non-kissing friends. When the kissing friends met up in public, I wonder if we shocked the Chinese around us, who don't hug or touch upon greeting, let alone kiss. I noticed my kissing friends in China were mostly Italian or of Italian heritage, or from the East Coast. Are you a kisser? My non-kissing friends are REALLY non-kissing. Funny how that happens. When I was younger, I thought kissing was either...

I just realized, both of my recent recollections about songs from John Legend and Jay-Z both involve V. What will I write about when I actually get to the letter V? John Legend's album Evolver , one of my all-time favorite albums. Very mellow, very sensual, very engaging. The day V. and I left Chongqing was crazy ; when we got to Chengdu it was raining, we had ALL of our stuff we were taking to America with us (I had more than he did, though; love when girl stereotypes are true!), and in the long-distance bus parking lot I was in a shouting match with a Chinese illegal taxi driver about the fare to take us to our hostel. V. asked me in English if we could pay the higher rate just to get us there. (He's very non-confrontational like that. I was prepared to keep yelling for a while, haha.) By the time we got to the hostel we were wet, loaded down and I can only speak for myself here, but generally just tired of dealing with China that day. My qipao was dirty and I'd been so...

I used to try to override my intuition with non-logic, mostly because I didn't want to believe the things my intuition was telling me were true. In China, I learned to embrace intuition. It's a very large part of Chinese culture, to accept things that cannot be explained and reasoned and logically construed. Often this was frustrating for me; "This makes no sense!" came out of my mouth on maybe an hourly basis my first year there. Once I let go of everything having to make sense or be logical, I was much happier living there. Then it became another of our catchphrases, "TIC." This is China. That explains it. And that's enough. -That person approaching you across the parking lot in an unsafe manner? Yeah, it's good to be suspicious of that person and tell them to back off. You're not rude. Nice people don't approach girls alone in a parking lot. -That guy who tells you he is single, but so many clues point to him not being completely hones...

I had to take a picture to really illustrate Bunny. Our group of friends stayed in a condo just off of the main square in Jackson Hole. (For those who don't know, Jackson is a ski resort town in Wyoming, full of quaint little log-cabin style shops selling expensive stuff, most of it incorporating sheepskin and leather and/or moose. It's very cute.) We were there to go to this event ; we donated a quilt for the auction. The day of, I styled my hair in one of my favorite lazy-day hairdos, little buns atop my head: That evening I was trying to decide between keeping the little buns or shaking them out into curls. I kept the little buns, mostly because it turns out they fit nicely under my panda hat and I didn't care what my hair looked like. The event was fun! There was a live band, then a DJ. Around 1:30 a.m. we started dancing with a group of guys who all came to Jackson to work and be ski bums. Super funny, super fun, super good dancers. So I'm normally a kind...

I just like knowing I live in a world where Henry Cavill exists: I absolutely do not think he would ask me out.  Turns out I have very little to say about H's! A few quick hits:  1. High-heeled camel boots: (I take it back. Henry Cavill might be blinded by the beauty of those boots and make it happen.)  2. Hugs and holding hands 3. Hot baths The H's are kind of old-school and simple, but the classics never stop being wonderful, I suppose.  _________ In other news, our girls' weekend in Jackson Hole, WY was COLD but hilarious and I came away with a new nickname, Bunny. But I'll tell that story in another post. 

Swear on the bible, earlier this week I saw a picture of Jake Gyllenhaal in internet-passing and thought, "I bet there's a good chance if he met me, he'd ask me out." This means one of three things: 1. My self-esteem is waaay out of control 2. I'm delusional 3. I'm delusional I don't ever think this about famous people, but you know what? I bet if I met Jake Gyllenhaal in person, he'd want to ask me out. He looks like a bunch of guys I went to college with, and they seemed to like me just fine. It could happen! Hehehe. _____ I've accepted that Google pretty much owns me; gchat, Google voice, gmail-- everything they do, I love. Except Buzz. That sucked. But everything else is great. I actually get disappointed when I have friends who use yahoo and hotmail because then we can't gchat. Which brings me to my second point: I've noticed lately that men kinda dislike email. One guy I know, he'll always answer my emails, but he...

Those of you who have been reading this blog a while know that in San Antonio I lived across the street from a firehouse. Most homes in my neighborhood were gated estates set back from the road, but I walked everywhere I could and ran in my neighborhood at night, so the firefighters would often see me outside and we'd say hello, and then chat a bit, and then we became friends. One year I couldn't go home for Thanksgiving and when they found out, invited me over to have Thanksgiving dinner with them. I brought pumpkin pound cake and we had a delicious dinner. (Firefighters are awesome cooks.) I was pretty honored they'd ask me to join them, and it remains a memorable Thanksgiving. I'm sure it's the only Thanksgiving I'll ever spend in a firehouse. I feel like firehouses are special places; they are setup up just to protect and help. Especially after living overseas, I appreciate that we have these places, and people willing to serve in them. I think nothing rea...

I have a bit of an ear/neck fetish. Ears are very sensitive, no? (That why we poke holes in them, I suppose.) A man who is a good ear kisser is permanently on the "I'll Always Remember You" list. (I love putting people on lists; it makes my life a lot more organized!) That particular list is short, but it's a good one. I prefer sleeping with my ears covered; grandma came to check on me one night and saw me on my side with the blankets covering my ear. She got such a kick out of that because she needs to have her ears covered when she sleeps, too. She bought me a silk pillowcase so I could sleep with silk over my ears, what a grandma! I'll often wake up in the morning with my arms and hands curled up around my head, the backs of my hands covering my ears. I have a hard time sleeping with other people in my bed because I want the blankets over my ears. I don't know why, but it's comforting to have my ears covered. Hey, at least it's not my nose! ____...

I have many declarations. My long-term favorite is "He/She/It is dead to me." I can hold a grudge like a hiker holding onto a ledge. It's a real talent. But last night R. and I were gchat video chatting (I love R.; she is, quite simply, awesome) and she said, "You know what sucks about being home? I can no longer excuse things by saying, 'Ain't no shame in China.'" She's right. "Ain't no shame in China" is a declaration I made about a year in, when I stopped being polite and started being real. (Ha! Old-school, in the house!) It became our rallying cry: Get hooked on Gossip Girl and actually discuss it with friends? Ain't no shame in China. Drink 120 proof Chinese liquor too quickly and puke all over your hotel room like a college kid? Ain't no shame in China. Kiss a guy in a bar (twice! In two different bars!) you'd never have kissed in America? Ain't no shame in China. Wear mismatched clothing and lots of c...

Today is my first day at my new job. This is a really good thing for me, I'm very happy about it. Something I treasure in my friendships: good conversation. Most of my friends, the thing I remember most about them are the conversations we have. They make me laugh, think, ponder, consider, and enjoy life. In China, I learned to appreciate good conversation because I could get around and do my daily duties, but I couldn't have in-depth conversations in Chinese; I really looked forward to and enjoyed the times I spent with other English speakers, just talking. One of my favorite nights in China was the night my girlfriends C. and E. and I hung out in a cozy Chinese bar, all soft couches and cushions and low light, talking about all the issues we face as women in China, in the world, in our own lives. I felt so supported and inspired by these ladies. R. and J. and I have had countless great talks on similar topics, and our experiences in education/jobs/relationships/living. The...

I first became interested in Buddhism when I visited Thailand several years ago. Two of my favorite quotations from Buddha: "What we think, we become." "We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make our world." Our minds are powerful; I'm trying to be more conscious of where I direct my thoughts and energy. I have found it is easy with practice to let go of material things, but it is tempting to me to hold on to thoughts of anger and resentment; they satisfy the ego very well. My ego struggles with letting go of these things, but slowly, slowly, I am seeing the wisdom of it. It's not my job to mete out punishment for wrongdoings. When I let go, I can move forward, and as for the other person? What will be, will be. It's actually a relief it has nothing to with me and is not my responsibility. I don't "lose" when I let go. This is what I'm working on making my ego truly believe. I do be...

My three favorite vegetables: artichokes, asparagus, avocados*. I learned to eat veggies from my Chilean mom, so I tend to eat them the Chilean way: steamed, with lemon juice, olive oil and salt. Some fresh garlic for the asparagus, too. Not the avocados! Those I mash up raw with lemon juice, salt, garlic powder and a bit of white cooking wine. Delicious. I've heard of people eating artichokes with mayo or some creamy dressing, but that just sounds awful to me. Do you like it that way? I can't get up the nerve to try it. I made artichokes yesterday for lunch and forgot about them on the stove, so the bottoms caramelized a bit. Oops. I just picked those leaves off, still delicious! I eat the hair and stem, too. The hair is my favorite part, when the artichoke is young and fresh. And swirling the heart and stem around in a little bowl of lemon juice, oil and salt, then biting in? Heaven. I make a meal of just artichokes, and I don't cut them down or make them pretty, ...

I was going to write today about China, but you know what? I realize my memories will never mean as much to other people as they do to me. And that's okay. I think if you've read my other posts, you have a good idea of what I loved, and what was difficult, about China. Sometimes I miss China so much my heart aches. Sometimes I'm relieved to be back in America where I understand the culture (although this took several months-- reverse culture shock is a real thing). I'm feeling much more comfortable here. Some big changes for me coming up. China did a good job preparing me for the rest of my life. It was a graduate course in flexibility, creativity, strength, courage, acceptance and doing things you never thought possible. I read an analogy recently that made a lot of sense to me, so I want to share it: if you think of life like a river, a lot of us are preoccupied with where we are in the river: what we have materially, or relationships, what we've achieved or...

Three months in, a few things I love about being back in America: 1. Walking into a store that has clothes and shoes in my size, and no one telling me I am too big or fat for their store. 2. Buying produce without having to weigh it first at a chaotic produce counter where if you don't shove to the front, you never get your stuff weighed. 3. No one screaming "Hello!" in my face as I'm walking by. 4. Super clean public bathrooms! 5. Everything smells so good. (Americans are very particular about smells, aren't we?) 6. Indoor climate control everywhere you go. 7. People smile at you and hold the door*. 8. Target. 9. So much cheese! 10. No firewall, no need to censor what I'm Googling, and I can take pictures of whatever I want.** *Stores in my part of China don't have doors, just an open wall, but no one smiles. ** In the video I posted recently of my neighborhood , you might not have noticed I was being very careful to keep the camera on my s...

It is not an exaggeration to say I would not have made it through my Peace Corps experience without the support of folks back home. So many people did so much for me. I'm putting together this week care packages for Thanksgiving/Christmas for some folks over in China; it means a lot for me to be able to give back for all the kindness shown towards me. It's so fun picking stuff out, knowing it'll be a treat for them. Thanks again to everyone who supported me, with packages and warm thoughts and kind words. I'm paying it forward in your honor.

Back in San Antonio, my friend Stacey had asked me to pick her up from the airport. It was full summer, and for those of you who haven't been in San Antonio in the summertime, you know that expression 'hot as an oven'? Well, I like to say San Antonio summers are 'hot as downwind from an exhaust pipe.' (Which means when you actually are downwind from an exhaust pipe, things get really unpleasant.) It's quite common for there to be a temperature difference of 35-40 degrees between indoor and outdoor air during a San Antonio summer. True story: I had a small heater at my work desk and turned it on in the summer, not winter, because the air conditioning was on so high in our building I froze to death at my desk. So anyway, I go straight from the gym to the airport to pick up Stacey. It's 10 pm but still around 100 degrees outside. Inside, it's a balmy 60 or so. Gotta give those tourists a false sense of comfort! I'm pacing a bit in the baggage area wa...

In Chongqing there aren't many foreigners compared to other big, populated in cities in China. This led to 'Panda Syndrome': we were often treated like special pandas at the zoo. Sounds nice, but really? It's not. I learned I could never handle being famous. One night a few of us Americans were having dinner with some Chinese students. They made a dish for us called 'hui guo rou' known in English as 'twice-cooked pork.' Someone asked what the dish was called and I answered with the correct name. The students started teasing him for not knowing the name and then one of the students said, "The girl knew what it was."  The girl? The girl teacher? The girl version of an American? The girl what ? It bothered me at the time because it was a bit dehumanizing and I was fighting for every bit of my humanity, but now it's kinda funny. Of course the guys who were there started calling me The Girl. It ended one night at dinner when J. was trying to p...