Truths

1. I thought I liked playing video games, but it turns out I just like thinking about playing video games.

2. Now when I see pictures of tan people on the internet, I think "Oh, what is she doing to her skin?!"

3. These days, if I had to choose between making out with a really hot guy and eating a big juicy hamburger, I'd probably eat the hamburger. Or at least, eat it first.*

4. I've stopped giving unsolicited advice. I'm an oldest child, it's hard to stop. But it's liberating, too. I'm not responsible that everything works out for you? Okay!

5. I keep asking people to send me Velveeta cheese, and I think they think I'm joking because no one sends me any**, but seriously: I want Velveeta cheese. I know it's gross. Don't judge.

6. I had a dream Alec Baldwin was hitting on me. Actually, I don't know if it was Alex Baldwin or Jack Donaghey, but still: brain, what's up with that? That's the best you could do?

7. I like Diet Coke because it hurts my mouth a little; way too fizzy, but oh so good. I guess I'm into S&M: Soda Masochism.

8. I love that my neighbor Andrew calls me on the phone when he wants to tell me something. It's so old school and friendly. Human voices are nice.

9. Yesterday at lunch Tristan explained to me about fertilized vs. unfertilized chicken eggs. I thought chickens laid fertilized eggs, we just ate them before they grew into chickens. I don't mind when people are smarter than I am. It happens a lot.

*There are no juicy burgers, so no hot mens' egos will be harmed by the fact they'd come second.

**Yesterday FloJo mailed me Velveeta cheese! This blog is like saying "Bloody Mary" in the mirror 3x.